Who 002

Off to a good start, i didn't crap out at one post. Third post: Feb 2013, here we come! Anyways, i didn't know how to tackle a situation i knew was going to happen. When an episode gives me too much to make fun of. I went with what i thought would be more visually neat. Then i went ahead and didn't draw it that well. Mo' well.

Other possible jokes about Ep.2 dealt with time travel theory. Yea, I've heard, that Dr Who doesn't have good time travel. So unless it's wackily over done with stupidness, i will try to keep a civil tongue. And i guess it would be premature to poke holes before they explain their rules for time travel. (like Futurama did in that one movie, then ruined it in a future episode. Back to the Future 2 does this as well.) But for shits and giggles, here is the comic i didn't make:

Rose: Doctah, so you know about the end of Earth. How?
Doctor: Well sweet Rose, I must have seen it before.
Rose: If you've been here before, where is your other self from another time?
Doctor: hmm, then i guess i must have heard about it or read about it in space time magazine.
Rose: But if you heard about this event, wouldn't you also have heard about the one group of witnesses that saw it, then were almost ransomed or killed by a horrible skin monster? Potentially actually killed since you wouldn't have been here to prevent it?
Doctor: ...
Doctor: LISTEN BITCH, MY HOME WORLD BLEW UP TOO! CHILLAX BABY

and scene.
That would have been too much to make in a simple comic. So here is the one i did make!

Disclaimer: Yea, these comics might have a few semi related spoilers for those who haven't seen it. I too have not seen passed the comics i make. So please don't correct the fallacies of my jokes if the answer is in a future episode. However, if i got it wrong, and the answer was in that episode or past episode, go to town and critique away.

Who 001

So i officially ran out of sci-fi shows to watch. (without digging to deep into pre 70s shows or anime. Which i will eventually do too) And i knew when this day came, and i was bored enough, i would finally start watching Dr Who, see what all the hubbub was about. My limited expierence from walking in on other people watching it made it seem overly campy. But more campy than should have such a mass appeal. So in theory, with slightly less laziness, i will attempt to portray my feelings about the show through art. Here are my thoughts on Ep1.

Abeds from a bed. (Damn I'm witty)

So i drew these for no reason on my tablet, and tried posting them from said tablet. So apparently you still can't post something from the mobile app and have pictures with the superpower to be clicked on. Luckily Abed is as cute tiny as he is huge. 3 seasons and a half.

edit: so non Batbed heads are clickable. Only furthering my evidence batman and his lookalikes are not internet clickable. (we will ignore the other batmen on this BaLrOG that can be clicked.) Sadly the non Batbeds don't get bigger when touched. (cause you're doing it wrong. Yuk yuk)

Rubixing and Rubiking

This was inspired by my feeble attempt to hit on someone ... in as creepy and as cute as possible. (let's dress up as Rubix cubes, and solve each other all night.) The line was more of a success than a face slapper. But now i have to work on my giant cardboard Rubix cube costume. Yes, i will be able to turn and be solved, albeit at a severe discomfort to me. 

Google's underlining of my words has brought to my attention that Rubix is actually spelled Rubik. So for the remainder of this site, we are all going to do the christian thing, and pretend that i can't draw K's very well.

Whoops

Why did none of you quantum fans send me a backward traveling message to tell me how long i've been neglecting you? well i guess in the future you're not waiting as long between posts as in present day takes me to make them. Ooops on me. Kudos to you quantum readers. Anyways, part of my time has been taken up by a super secret project that i will gladly tell anybody about who asks. This next thing has nothing to do with that.

So to get myself motivated each day, i should do warm up sketches like all my artist heroes do. Or they lie so i take up more of my time so i am less of a threat. Fucktards. Regardless of their fucktardery, i shall do the thing i just said i was to do. I want to come up with a quick sketch of something everyday. So i need a theme. This month's theme is 80s SPACE OPERA! I started, for about a week, on this idea, so i have like 3 characters already drawn out somewhere else. But not 30 days worth of material. So i will be creating an 80s Space Opera little by little on this BaLrOG of joy.

This here is, uh, some kid. Guess i need to name these guys too. Right now he is known as The Cosmic Sword! or maybe just The Space Sword. Something space followed by Sword! (he has a small sword scar on his eye.) He is the strongest kid in the known galaxy! (name of this known galaxy pending) Able to punch through anything, or crush whatever. But he hates that he was created for the raw energy in his body. So where ever possible, he opts to use one of his two Coil Guns. Due to some supervillainous misdeed, the Cosmic Sword was created. I kinda forget how i came up with his original creation. I didn't write it down, and only told one person who wasn't paying attention. Something to do with two suns colliding, and he was born in the energy resulting from that. But there was something else more cool about that. Cooler than being born from two suns exploding into one another. If not, i GUESS that's cool enough. More on this kid's past and future as more characters and places arise.

This project was conceived from me discovering all kinds of Space related fantasy movies from the 80s that were animated. Some from Canada, some that never saw wide releases. But i found out about them (even just hearing about them) in the last year. I kind of miss that aesthetic. It was awful, but it was cult awful. Check out Starchaser - The Legend of Orin for a great example. That's where a lot of these inspirations will be coming from anyway. This posted picture i created an hour before midnight, and missed posting on the 1st. So hopefully there will be two posts today, many hours apart. So this sketch isn't the quality i am looking for in a quick sketch. I don't know what i will be aiming for, but i will be trying something different from this in future posts. (the yellow of the gun and the blue of his vest should be glowing more. They ain't. There will be more pictures of the Cosmic Sword, in better styles! Maybe the Cosmic Kid? Cosmic Sword Kid? Kid Cosmic Sword? That last one has a bell ringing, and its for me)


UPDATE: whoops. turns out i am still crazy lazy. Maybe later i will concoct an easier and more excitable daily drawing thing. So stay tuned for ... something at somepoint!

Some folk

Well here is a picture i made in the out doors. Or out in the world. Either way, i went for a stroll to find a pumpkin flavored beverage, landed at a place that made a decent pumpkin vanilla milkshake, and spent my time making these two best of friends goofing off in the soothing autumn air. Let's just say its autumn, as i didnt put any indicators of any kind of tangible place for these to dashing fellows. Shut up. I'll do backgrounds when I'm good and ready! Your silence will not make me cry. Not again.

So i got myself a fancy new android tablet. (this does not mean that i once had an old android tablet) This one is slightly more special-like, for is comes with a mostly pressure sensitive pen so i can draw things, on the go. I cannot find an easy way to get said pictures from there to here, so things wont be as immediate as i would hope. But, in theory there should be many ah more update. But the program i use has trouble turning images 90 degrees. But that will give some of you quantum cows some exercise, with mild head tilting. But the yogurt is also cursed.

This here is a lady i drew at some Dr Sketchy's Anti-Art school burlesque draw thing. This was the day i really tried to put my new device through some hoops. This came out of it, and i like this. Its fairly close to how the model looks. I think. I could have also been drunk. There are some kinks to work out of the machine, most of which i have found tiny loop holes, but hopefully the newly announced adobe android touch apps will solve any problems i have with existing software. Was that enjoyable? did you like hearing a vague amount of behind-the-scenes shop talk? Why am i asking ... you can't answer until the future when i am famous and/or dead. Well i will put a modicum of Tech things with entertainment so everyone can be moderately dissatisfied across the board. You're welcome.

(i might flip that Hamster comic around. I might not. It's got 20 words. Deal with it.)
edit: i flipped it. I went through dropbox, and just like ... flipped it there, and it automatically updated on this thing. Sometimes the internet doesnt hate me. Sometimes i get dog porn in my email. Sometimes i think about unsubscribing, but really, who's it hurting?

Det. T.Rex.

And here be another warm up picture i spent too much time on. This is Detective Trex ... he has the body of a well endowed man (i asked) and the head of the upper half of a tyrannosaurus rex. He solves mysteries with all the slyness of a man dinosaur. (read: he falls down a lot.)

nintenpoop

I have been busy doing things and doing nothing. So i am attempting to do warm up sketches when i feel like it. But that's just another way to not do the work i am supposed to do. Here is Link the Fairy Killer.

and Mario the turtle killer. Enjoy you terrible rapscallions

Turtle Nemesis

Woah, its been a cock long time. Well longer than that, depending on WHOM's cock you speak of. So to you future fans, reading this as present fans, from my self published time autobiography - wherein i tell about myself hence and forth in time, you will recall that this current time, past to you, is when i went through (and still in mid) The Maddening. A trial of depression coaxed on by good fortune and mediocre luck. Don't you just hate that? when one thing goes wrong, EVERYTHING goes ... kinda right? making you not appreciate that crap all the more? no? spoiled; me? Pishaawwww.

Anyways, in order not to turn this blog into a whiny LiveJournal post, here am some art. I did this actually at the beginning of The Maddening. But you know, i was maddened, so i didn't post it until now ... mostly procrastinating other work. So this was for a gallery of TNMT, the most vague topic yet, and this time i didn't create it the night before. No, because i forgot when the due date was, and drew it the day of (during an animation meeting rehearsal thing.) and printed and submitted the day after. But the dudes who do the thing are cool as always and junk. Anyways, this piece was done out of love and spite. In my time biography, see the chapter interwoven with The Maddening titled My 1st Art Nemesis. He or she is a guy or gal who may or may not have been jealous to have been in or been excluded from the Turtle show. Maybe.

Hopefully more art is to follow. Since i have more time on my hands currently than i know how to focus correctly. See interwoven chapter: Forced Retirement at 26.

Doodles! Oh the doodles

Hey there quantum believers. You may be looking through these ancient archives since my main hub of interest is some hyper holographic area of artistic congregation. At the moment, i believe it is called The Horror Boner. Though i imagine that by the time you quantum fans are mightily amassed, the name will be quite different. Something more inappropriate as conservativeness is mostly obliterated.

Anyways, i have been playing off an on with a new photoshop brush. Stumpy Pencil ver2. (in case you wanted to google it. You know, the verb; To Google)

This here was my main character of an ongoing (mental) story. Now he is some shlump.

This other gentleman is Captain

Nocrime. He is very against crime. Also, not an homage to Brock Samson. Unless that hurts your feelings. Then it might be. Unless you are a lawyer. Then that guy's hair color is magenta. Also his symbol is supposed to be reminiscent of a NO sign. (ala Ghostbuster) But the diagonal cross is through a C ... for crime. It looks like a cent sign, or a simplified hammer and sickle. GO (away) CRIME, GO!

PAX pokemans

So i went to PAX (east) and had a generally rockin time. I won't bore you, who weren't there, with how it was the best place on Earth for Nerdkind. And i won't shock you, who were there, with how much fecal matter one comes across at these things, if you are looking for fecal matter that is. (like a scavenger hunt. No points for anything found in a traditional bathroom*.)

I will only bore those of you perusing this internet diary, hidden in the attic of google, in the pad locked trunk of Blogger ... in a well, in a goat, within a duck, inside a mouse, locate interiorly in that of a small horse ... with that which pertains to my art.

So here is my hobby, of getting famous folk to sign a caricature of themselves with empty speech bubbles. As i did for XO Tigh of the Battlestar Gallactica. As i did (but not achieve) with Bruce Campbell. (i'll get ye, ye salty sona bitch) I clearly did not plan this out the day before like usual. Nor at all. It was last minute to spend my Sunday at PAX to wait in line for their signature of a drawing i made whilst waiting in that very Que line. I thought they would be impressed.

Well i was fairly at the end of that line. So just when i was done the picture, but still about 20-30min away, I was told that the Penny-Arcade legends themselves ... would be rushing through the last of the signatures. Which was fine. I didn't bring all of my beenie babies for them to sign, like some people. I got there, and they were plowing through their signatures. I gave them my quick spiel about what it was i had for them. Mike (the one throwing the pokeball) Wrote the "Poop" as fast as he could and slid it down. Jerry (the pocket monster depicted) Wrote "Some like it ..." he paused for what seemed forever, about 3 seconds... and finished it.

So i got no kudos nor shame for my engraven image of them. So they probably only barely analyzed it and wrote something random. (Mike probably writing Poop in the 1st speech bubble he saw) Or saw it and HATED their likenesses on page, and wanted it out of their sights immediately... Or simply had no time to commend me on my ability to immortalize their stunning physics via pen and paper. My ego shall go with ... the next option. They were merely too stunned and speechless to say much, and were so internally miseased, shunned it from the table, and their collective thoughts. Only to subconsciously strive to ascertain such comic hilarity portrayed hither. And yon.

*traditional bathroom: a bathroom indicated as such with a small ideogram of a human, being male, female, both, or those with wheels for butts. Some instances of celestial shapes have been used.

Places not indicated include, but not limited to; telephone booths, sheds, desk drawers, trashcans, one's own pants, another's owned pants, dog bowls, shampoo containers, afros (both african and jewish), stain glass windows, in the center of giant steel advertising donuts, (despite common opinion) Mexico, little girl dollhouses (including the tiny bathroom replicas wherein), computer terminals for the olfactory challenged, Mark Summers (of Nickelodeon's Double Dare and What Would You Do?), 3/4 of the still living teletubbies, and flesh wounds.

New piece up dude, dudettes and dude-eaters. (eater of dudes) This one is nice and straight forward. It was for Toys for Tots, and we had the option of donating monies made from the arts we made to ... the tots. So i donated a potential half. (it has to sell 1st for it to count) So that seems to give me the right to jack up my usual asking price. Though some seem to think i've been asking too little anyway? What do you think? i've only been asking for the moderate price of: Your eternal childhood innocence! And the gallery gets 20% of that. So maybe i should start asking for more. We shall see. And smell.

Happy so on Folks! So here is the newest piece for you to gawk at. I am sure some of you might feel a sense of awe for the Majesty contained therein for seeing such a nobely endeavored selection of scribbles in art. Some may feel horrified that i mutilated one beloved childhood friend, and suggest another is a college jockette strumpet hussy that can only wear the sexy version of an inherently unsexy idea of a costume whenever the chance arises. Either way, shut up, i dig it. This gallery was Halloween in videogames. Or maybe Horror in videogames. Possibly Summer Memories. I forget.

(side note, hopefully you have that option to shrink or expand an image, because i forgot to make a smaller web-friendly version of this slightly large piece. Also the largest i've made for a show, as it was printed at 11x14. Possible size comparison images coming soon)

Quickish assignment

Hi-ho (kermit reference) non-fans. I will add more standard cheekiness to this post later, but i need to link one of my drawings to another page via link. So up here it goes. And you get to benefit, so shut your collective yammerings!

Sketch day

quick sketch of the day. Batman. In a beautiful world i would make AT LEAST one of these a day. But as we all know, i'm a lazy sack of lazy potatoes. Not the worst kind of potatoes*, but close. Also people would pay me obscene amounts of cash to draw nonsesne. I mean come on, Batman has a lower body and longer arms. Also Batman is spelled with a "T". See? this is nonsense.



*the worst kinda potato is the Sally Potato. 3 bites legally changes your name to Sally. If your name is already Sally, then it kills you, and changes your name to Gene. Terrible potato.

Hellboys and Hellgirls

So quantum believers, as you no doubt looked up on your arm-grafted Light-Puters, i got one of my early breaks just recently to me, perhaps upwards of a decade or more to you. This would be the Hellboy art show in philadelphia, at the local comic book shoppe Brave New Worlds. so i made two pieces, one i spent some time drawing, and the other i spent more time writing. One lacks the quality of the other. So this one right here is the funnier one, where i made various characters as they would appear in the Highschool Yearbook. Big news? Or old to you by now? this mother sold. I originally put a $15 tag on this, but for some reason, it sold for $25. That like totally covered cost of paper and frames, for these guys, and all the others that didn't sell ... and subsequently the frames of those broke, not allowing them to be reused ... and so on.

So this one here is the one i spent artistic time on, which did not sell. Which i'm totally fine with. Any hypernet rumors you read about my tearful lament were greatly untruthified. But i think it looks neat, and i take pride in the ubber corny poem i made. Guess thats it. Enjoy the 3rd in what is considered a almost reasonable short time of updates.

Phew-eee

Man this things are becoming regular events concurrent with daylight savings or some such. Well i have a few goodies here, that i shall share intermittently. This here is from a few months back, from an art gallery my friend hosts. That show was the 80s Videogame show. Though i think the 80s part of it was taken from the title. Anyways, there were lots of great pieces at the show. Now being the phenomenal narcissist that i be, i generally will enter a collection of art and be either among the best artistically or best humorously. This show humbled my grandness for about a night, as i wasn't even close to the top ten in either category, in my opinion. But since i'm not posting any of the others' works, all you get to know is how awesome this one piece is. Unless you are familiar with 'I am 8-bit'. Then i don't look so hot. Enjoy.

For those who are unaware because your videogame knowledge is severely lacking, this is my tribute to the classic game Burgertime. Only i reversed the ominous roles of the chef and the food people, and subsequently the tiny baby sausage people. I also charged $19.87 for this ... or something close to that price, reflecting the year it was made. It did not sell. I would sell it to all you humble folk, but you can just as easily save this to your harddrives, you damned moochers.

Good ideas with testicles on the side

So i had a brilliant idea. For a hypothetically awesome night. I met Bruce Campbell tonight, somewhat, he was present for the showing of My Name is Bruce for a Q n A. So he walked by me a few times. And each time i froze. So the plan was to ask him an awesome question or have him sign something more awesome. DVD? Toy? poster? AH .. a drawing i made of him. Perhaps as an insane Campbell that thinks he truly is Ash. Perfect. What should drawn Bruce be saying? couldnt think. Drew a speech bubble in early thumbnails ... in my head. Eventually i came up with the bestest idea ever. DONT PUT ANYTHING IN THE BUBBLE! so when bruce signs it, he can write whatever the fuck he wants to! Maybe i would start a trend of this. Knowing famous folk are coming my way, draw up a cariacture of them, and have them fill in speech bubbles! awesome! Only bruce campbell wasnt signing anything, and the 10 fantastic lies i came up with to make him do it were shot down by my crippling frozen body when he would come near. Him and Weird Al are all i would freeze for.

To make up for my introvertedness, i made fun of some douches behind me. They were talking throughout the movie, making bad jokes ... laughing at them. Then when Bruce should have shown up for the Q n A, they started chanting BOO .. BOO-Ruce ... BOOOO-RUCE ... and thought they were some fuckin shits. So i laughed as loud and as hysterically as i could, during their silence, overly explaining their joke. Theyre best comeback was that they guess people with beards can make jokes. They werent worthy of my ridicule, they wouldnt get it. Luckily Bruce called them douches when he showed up. Sol good. So here's the blank bubble picture of ol brucie.

Im closer now to Kevin Bacon than ever

So i was informed today that apparently some celebrity knows me ... more specifically my beard. If any of you have had the viewing pleasure of Kat Dennings, Her IMDB thing , this would be the dame. Through some crazy whisper-down-the-lane stuff, my crazy beard came up in someone's conversation, and she seemed to recollect it ... one would hope fondly. I have had several styled beards in the last many months and years, though now i would consider my face fuzz to be quite tame ... think a Hasidic Lucifer, but the point is a little more rounded off than usual ... but the curly mustache is in full effect. So if Kat, you are for some unfathomable reason single, and looking at my currently unvisited website because someone name dropped you in Google and landed you here, feel free to contact me... that crazy beard is is still here and ready to show you the exciting night life of Philly. Me, i'll be at home, twiddling my thumbs as you and the beard drive around in his convertible hearse with the Jolly Roger painted on the windshield. Man that sucka knows how to roll.

Okay, i feel a little bad for simply updating with no picture, and i was going to leave it at that, but i do have a resevoir of new pictures i have yet to show you gentle, humble, quantum fans. Here is a picture for the upcoming Dark Knight. One should note this drawing wasn't done in my excitement for the movie, but truly showing my lack of good taste as this picture was honestly done an hour after the late Mr Ledger's announcement that he was now late to life. Just remember, i currently do respect the man both as a Patriot and a gay Cowboy who likes pudding, and i hope to respect him dressed in my Prom Tux ... but regardless, enjoy my humor.

Oh yea, and most of this should have been inked and colored in black... and the Joker's thumb should be existent; which i will BS and say the thumb has been rigor mortis'ed behind his palm and away from the viewers' (THAT YOU!) perception, or something to that extent ... excuse my laziness. See how classy of a guy i am Kat Dennings? Call me.